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I said Jerome in tha house

15 Oct

Oh y’all.  Today was CRAY-CRAY!!  The Uhaul had to be turned in by 5:00 pm and Chad and Casey both had to work.  Yes, on Sunday.  Ugh.  Don’t even go there.  There was a shat load of stuff to be done with only Janna and I to do it because Mom has been having some fluttering with her A-fib (please say a little prayer for her) and Dad can’t help us for obvious reasons.  Our crazy cousin, Eboni, got drafted to help us and UT and Aunt Laine took all of the kids to their house.  OMG.  The task at hand was so overwhelming that we wasted a good 45 minutes trying on Max’s (my nephew) wig and beard for his halloween costume.  Oh!  Did I tell you that he decided to be Jesus?  Well, he did.  Anyway, here’s what had to be done:

1. The garage that was full of boxes had to be completely emptied so that we could get to the washing machine.  The washing machine had to be pulled to the front so that we could take it to be exchanged (it had a little leak).

2.  We had to sort all of the boxes into three groups: storage, garage sale, house

3.  Then we had to repack the garage with the boxes keeping a big enough pathway to bring in the new washing machine.

4.  Next we loaded all of the stuff for storage onto the Uhaul.

5.  The three of us piled into the Uhaul with yours truly at the helm.

6.  It was funny.  Eboni was scared.  Janna was cackling and taking pictures the entire time.

7.  We made it to the storage unit with only one slight mishap.  ONE, folks.  That’s it.  We broke a piece of my parent’s very expensive bedroom furniture.  Ugh.  Both doors broke off of the armoire thing.  It fell over when I turned the corner.  We were pretty much devastated.  But that was the only sad part of today.

8.  We unloaded everything into TJ and Meg’s storage unit (thanks, guys, for letting us invade your space until the office is open and we can rent our own.  I mean until Chad and Casey are off work and can go move all that crap into a different unit.)  We thought we might need a little help moving the armoire so we asked these two random guys a few units down if they would help us unload it.  They both walked down there and one of the fart-heads stood there like a giant turd and watched my sister carry the heavy end of the armoire while his buddy carried the other end.  I said, “Don’t worry about it, homey, she’s a tough mudder.  You ever heard of that?” Of course he hadn’t.  I told him to google it when he got home.  Whatevs.   I think maybe the fart-head was high.  He just kinda stood there staring.  He looked a little like Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite minus the mustache.  Weird.  What dude just stands there and watches a 5’6″ girl lift an armoire with his buddy?  WTH has this world come to?!?!?!?!?!  That’s a whole nuther post.

9. I successfully drove the giant Uhaul out of the storage unit maze – which, I must say, is extremely impressive.  There was a ton of back and forth maneuvering AND I never ran into anything.  Really.

10. On the way to return the Uhaul, we realized that we had all ridden together in the Uhaul for obvious reasons, namely fun, and we were now going to be stranded at the Uhaul place.

11.  We called Eb’s dad, UT (Uncle Terry), to come pick us up.  He also brought all of the kids with him.  He drives a pickup truck.  Sooooooooo, Janna, Eb, and I had to ride in the bed back to my parent’s house.  It was funny.  And fun.  And possibly illegal?  Not sure on that one.

Pretty much it was one of the most grueling, most hilarious days that I’ve had in the LONGEST time.  HUGE shout out to our rad cousin, Eboni, for helping me and Janna.  She used her entire Sunday – the day of freaking rest – to help her nutty azz cousins.  We love you to the moon and back, Ebbers.

Here are some pics to chronicle the day.  Enjoy:

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Eboni’s gangsta stylin’ self just sittin’ on the truck waiting on somebody to make a decision.

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An example of the “end of packing” ghetto move situation.

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How the ghetto packing made me feel.

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How the ghetto packing made Eboni feel.

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One final pose with the moose.  Glory hallelujah, I loved that Uhaul.

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Luli at the wheel.  I ain’t playin’, folks.  Fire this mug up and let’s get the job done, son.

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Luli, can ya watch the road, please?  Eb is having an anxiety attack, gripping the handlebar with white knuckles the entire time.  I said, “Well, Eb, would you rather drive this thing?”  “Well, hell no,” said Eb.

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The sign said it would be best to keep it in the green, so naturally I had to take it to the red one time.  Naturally.

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We finally got to the Uhaul store and the “new lady” checked the truck back in.  She totally tried to charge us for “using an extra day.”  This is how Janna looked when she told her the cost that was going on her credit card.

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I got nervous and got inside the display box.

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Janna decided to lay down in the waiting area until the manager could help us.

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Let me recommend Darrold Hunt’s Uhaul store at 7525 SE 29th Street in MWC.  That’s all I’ll say about that.

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UT and the kids finally got there to pick us up.

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We rode in the bed of the pickup truck together just like when we were kids.

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Janna was past the point of delirium.

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Eb and I were just happy to be alive – stanky arm pits and all.

And I would be posting the best video ever made in America at this point but my “blog guy” (who shall remain nameless only because he is a free blog guy) won’t teach me how to properly post videos on here and the one I actually did get on here was totally by accident and went to the wrong place so I’m just leaving it like it is because I’m tired and it’s almost 3:00am so WHATEVER.  I WILL get that other video posted, though.  OMG I love you, Eboni!!!!!!!!!!!!  You are hilarious.  Glad you had me as a role model.  LOLOLOLOLOL!!!  All those family vacations to Padre paid off.

That’s it for today.

Love,

Luli

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2 Responses to “I said Jerome in tha house”

  1. Jantie October 15, 2012 at 8:07 am #

    You have me a whole 2 inches. This tiny gal is only 5’4″. For real. I would type more, but I am at 7-11 and need to get my azz on the road to work. Love ya. Had the best time yesterday during labor camp! Eboni is the bomb diggity. The end. For now.

  2. loveluli October 16, 2012 at 3:19 am #

    Reblogged this on loveluli and commented:

    I totally fixed the video disaster much thanks to my grouchy blog master, David Hayden. Heart you, David. I know I’m annoying but look at the excitement and joy I bring!!! Woot!!! Vids are up! I said Jerome in tha hou-ouse!!!!!!!

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